Miami Sports- The City of Champions

An actual quote from Fredi Gonzalez following Monday night’s 4-2 win over the Nationals:

“Boni, even through all the stuff he’s been going through, at the beginning of the year and hitting .900 and people expecting him to hit .970, he comes every day to work and he’s getting better. He’s got a nice little hitting streak going. He’s hitting a little over .300 from the right side…He’s doing fine. He’s one of those guys you characterize as a winner because he’ll find something to do during the course of a game to help you win a ballgame.”

Seriously? That’s your analysis of Emilio Bonifacio’s season? That he’ll “find something to help you win a game”. We’ve never really understood what that means. Perhaps his .299 OBP is beneficial to the team. Not in terms of scoring runs obviously, but hey, maybe we should give him credit because he works hard.

It’s laughable at this point, what the Marlins have done with Boni. Every chance they get, they defend him, as if he’s their golden ticket to the Chocolate Factory. Name one thing Bonifacio does to help a team. Forget for a second “how hard” you may or may not think he works, or whether his speed even matters given that he can’t run bases. Just isolate his baseball skills. Does he do anything well? The only point to concede here is the lack of options to take his spot. Wes Helms, Ross Gload, and perhaps Gaby Sanchez. It’s not the most enticing list you’ve ever seen. But it can’t get much worse can it? Mark Grace used to break his “slumps” by going into opposing cities and banging the fattest chick he could find. Gross, obviously…. But maybe it’s time we made Bonifacio into a fat chick with 3 moles and 2 hairs poking out, and made him another team’s bitch.

Matt Lindstrom is no longer the Florida Marlins closer. It was a formality at this point, given the unpredictable nature with which he’s controlled the position all season, yet it took an official injury to move him out. The official word is a right elbow sprain, with what looks like 6 weeks of shelf time. With Kiko Calero out of the fold, and Dan Meyer being the best lefty in the pen, the job falls on the (Pedro Martinez delivery esque) shoulders of Leo Nunez, though at this point, who really cares? As long as Matt Lindstrom stays the hell away from close games in late innings, the Marlins will be better for it….way better for it

Let’s set the story for those late to the party. This past Sunday, the Marlins were busy pounding the Yankees in the ass, as they are want to do (see: 2003 World Series), and the Yanks lost 6-5. The final two innings were played under protest due to Joe Girardi throwing a bitch fit. Essentially, Alejandro De Aza was brought into the game as a pinch hitter, and didn’t replace Coghlan in the outfield until a pitch was thrown, thus making him ineligible (get it?, Us neither…). Girardi is the same guy who consistently would bunt with Dan Uggla in the first inning, bunted with Hanley Ramirez with 2 strikes against the Mets, and famously brought back Josh Johnson after an hour plus rain delay, causing Johnson to miss an entire year. He’s not the brightest guy you’ll ever meet, and honestly, do you really expect anything different, given that he played as a Yankee his whole career and now manages the New York Douchkees?

Long story short, his protest was denied. Bleep you Girardi!

We were told by sources today, (Ed. Update: Juan Rodriguez also has heard similar things) that a scene straight out of professional wrestling occurred today within the Marlins clubhouse. Hanley Ramirez was hit in the elbow during the 6th inning of Sundays game versus the Blue Jays. Allegedly, Hanley was upset that Josh Johnson didn’t retaliate, and said so to reporters in both English and Spanish.

When Fredi was told of the situation he asked to hear the clips himself. Upon hearing them, Gonzalez become outraged and kicked out multiple reporters to have a closed door meeting with Ramirez himself. We are told that Hanley was as angry as ever, and had to be calmed down multiple times. Josh Johnson also hinted a few times at the notion that Ronny Paulino is the guy he wants catching his every start, noting that (for whatever it’s worth) Paulino and he are always on the same page in terms of pitches to call, and how to attack a hitter.

And listen to Bob Barker on with the Le Batard show today. (Click here to listen).

-Seriously though, what’s funnier than Bob Barker saying “bitch” 17 times in the interview. Hilarious.

Friend of the site, Will Carroll (whom we interviewed here, and here) released his ‘Under the Knife’ column today, which updates all of the ongoing injuries in the league. Two of the Marlins best players are included in the column: Jorge Cantu and John ‘the’ Baker. We can’t write everything Carroll wrote, because Baseball Prospectus is a subscription based site, but here’s what we CAN tell you.

- Cantu has a cholesterol condition, for which he takes a medication to help aid his symptoms. The problem, however, is that the side effects (severe dizziness) have been more damaging than the potential relief it provides. He’s expected to swap medicines and the problem should be resolved shortly.

- Baker was smacked in the face, near the eye, on Albert Pujols’ backswing a couple days ago. Baker got the area sticked up, and is expected back in the lineup soon, in all likelihood tomorrow against the Blue Jays.

2:50 EDT update: Was listening to Sedano’s podcast, and they brought on Fredi Gonzalez for his weekly show. Fredi said that he talked to Baker this morning, and that Baker said he “felt worse today than he did yesterday”, though Fredi mentioned that Baker will play 2 of the 3 games in Toronto.

We’ll try to just step out of the way and let you enjoy one of the funniest moments in the Dan Le Batard Show’s history. The set up: A female calls the show, saying how ’sexy’ she thinks Stugotz is. Stugotz gets flustered, and his lack of game is on display for all to see.

Mike Hill, the general manager of the Marlins was on the Jorge Sedano Show this morning (one of our best interviewee’s ever) and was asked about Emilio Bonifacio.

Sedano: Mike, at what point does Bonifacio not getting on base become a detriment to the team?

Hill: Well, I think a lot more pressure is put on Emilio when our lineup as a whole isn’t hitting, and we saw it earlier with Cameron Maybin. When you aren’t getting production from your established hitters, it puts a lot of pressure on your young players. Yes, we expect him to do what he’s capable of doing, and he’s working very hard to do that. But I think from our standpoint, if we start to see his confidence waver, or him getting away from what he’s supposed to be doing that’s when you really have to take a second look at what you’re doing.

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One of our favorite local columnists (along with Le Batard and Skolnick) is Dave Hyde of the Sun-Sentinel. Hyde is a fantastic writer, and does a good job of cutting through the cliches and nonsense surrounding sports to bring you smart, interesting columns on a pretty damn frequent basis. He was kind enough to do an interview with us, and damn is it good. As always our questions in bold:

1) It’s kind of staggering to believe, but you’ve been with the Sun-Sentinel for 19 years. Talk to us a little bit about you got there, how you elevated your status to ultimately at column writing. Did you always want to be a columnist?

-It’s staggering to me to hear it’s staggering. It doesn’t seem so long until I realize I was on hand to write about the birth of the Heat, the Marlins and the Panthers. Like many outsiders, I came to South Florida to take a job with The Miami Herald, thinking I’d stay a year or two. At some point a path became a career. I always had wanted to be a columnist, and Fred Turner of the Sun-Sentinel took a chance. He offered me the job when I was in San Francisco covering the Earthquake World Series. Yep, it took a cataclysmic force of nature to make it happen. I had no idea what I was doing for several years — somedays, I still don’t. The best thing about the job is getting to talk with and ask questions about people at the top of their profession. The worst part always is wondering how to crank out four columns a week when you have two ideas..

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On May 13th, friend of the site, Marc Hochman (Le Batard show producer) introduced a stimulus package to save the economy. He came on the air that day at 3:00 p.m. and told all the listeners to bet everything they had on the Minnesota Twins that evening. He lamented the fact that Dontrelle Willis was coming back, and that it was a lock he would lose, and lose big.

The Tigers lost that evening, and Hochman won plenty of money. Willis’ next start, Hochman advised to stay away from, citing the notion that even Willis would have ONE good start in him. That night, Willis pitched 6 shutout innings and won 4-0. Every start henceforth, Hoch has advised the listeners to bet big on the team opposing Willis. In those three starts, Willis is 0-3, with 12 innings and 15 earned runs. Today comes word from Hoch, via Twitter, to bet the house again. We love our readers here, so we are letting you in on the biggest stimulus package this country has ever seen. Call your bookies, bitches!

Hoch’s Tweet:

Hochman Stimulus Plan is in effect tonight. Dontrelle pitches against White Sox. Bet White Sox. Heavy odds, but it’s free money. Hoch